Concert Review in the form of an appology letter or "I perfer the sur-up"

Dear Shins,

I ardently appologise for the show you played at first avenue last night. I appologise for the minnesotans who bodysurfed, held lighters in the air, clapped, and did the fist in the air thing. Furthermore, I appologise that you could see all the way across the first avenue dance floor - there's lately been a ban on smoking and I personally neglected to organize a civil disobedience protest last night, next time I will.

Sincerely,
Desiderius Erasmus

post script: I'm not one to get all hairy about being irritated by patrons at a good show, but a guy in a brown, yellow and mauvre vertical striped shirt hit me in the balls one too many times while slapping his girl's ass in time to the music; I'm not sure I've been more irritated.